Many years ago, I unknowly started down the path of becoming a coach. To be honest I didn’t really know what path I was on. I was looking at the future with determination that I would figure it out eventually. I had recently dropped out of college and was working as a breakfast cook at a restaurant with some friends and had been doing well enough to be promoted to a training position. My boss saw me as someone who had what it takes to help develop the staff around me to adhere to the standard operating process that were needed to create a consistent product for the guests that ate there. I thought it was the greatest thing ever. Helping people become better at what they do.
Today I am writing about how I became a coach. This is a story that I have not wanted to share because of the response that you get from stating that you work or have worked in a restaurant. I am going to share it anyway because I feel that it has been a worthwhile part of my journey. It starts with my twelve-year trek through the restaurant industry. That is how I gained my leadership experience and found out that I enjoy having impactful conversations.
As this went on, I had an opportunity to develop into higher roles and I gained the experience needed to enter into management. I also started a family at this time as my oldest child was born a few months shy of a year into this process. This is where I found the first problem that I would continue to experience as a manager. How to balance the responsibility of running a business and having quality time with my family. I kept a focus on my skills of developing others as a way to achieve my goals and gain more freedom with my family. This turned to be a double edge sword because as I developed more effective teams, I would be handed more challenging problems to create solutions for. I knew the rewards would eventually lead to better pay. Which I told myself would lead to a better life.
BUT I was missing something, Boundaries. I ran so fast in every direction that I was never truly in one place or the other. My work suffered; my family suffered. I couldn’t even enjoy the time that I could spare for myself because I felt that there was something better to do. So, like everyone else who faces this problem, I became a burnt-out zombie and sat idly by as my life fell apart. You think of it, and it happened to me. I didn’t know what to do. I went through a divorce and found many vices to comfort myself. I gave in to what my life had become and thought that someday I’ll find a better version of everything I had and then I could be happy again. I wanted to fix everything but the problem because I was the problem. I would rather suffer and struggle through life than fix me.
I had times where I was doing well. Even on autopilot I was more focused on helping those that worked for me to become better, become more. That lead to me finding my current fiancée, who worked with me. You could say that we literally fell into love, because it was not something that either of us had planned. our relationship grew and grew. She saw me differently than other people did. She saw me at my worst, and she did something that no one else had done until then. She made me see how uncomfortable I was and then she motivated me to be better. Then she helped me change. She held me accountable. So, I started getting curious as to who the better Justin was. I restarted my growth journey and found a person inside of myself that I felt to be this new me. I found books, podcasts, YouTube videos, masterclasses, and eventually I found Mindvalley.
This is where I found out that coaching is something that can actually be a career! It made so much sense! A name for what I had been doing all along. I developed a habit routine, then I redeveloped it, and tweaked it. I made it into something that game me energy and purpose. I saw my life changing before my eyes. Then I found out that Mindvalley had a certification course for coaches. How to fine tune and perfect my desired trade. I started coaching for practice with other classmates, then I started coaching for free. It was a step into who I wanted to be. Now I charge for coaching. I am a coach, I made myself into who I wanted to be. It was a process that’s for sure and it was a process that could have been so much easier if I only knew of coaching beforehand. Now I take all that I have learned and do just what I have been doing for all these years. I coach people so that when they have these problems, they can get through them in the most powerful way. I help them, so that they can hit their goals, solve their problems, and create the boundaries that they need so that they are there for their families.
Because if they are the most important part of your life, they should be the most important part of your life.